“My third pregnancy was very hard on me, both physically and emotionally. I had so many more fears this time around. I was afraid of labor, afraid of having another vaginal birth, afraid of not having another vaginal birth. Mostly I was afraid of parenting a third baby. This pregnancy had been a surprise, and not a particularly welcome one at that. I knew I wasn’t ready for a third child. I could barely manage with the two I had. I really worked at resolving this fear before the baby came, but sometimes nine months just isn’t long enough to fix everything.
Maddie and Emily both came at exactly 39 weeks and 2 days, with labor starting at 39 weeks and 1 day. With that in mind, as we headed to bed on February 7th (39 weeks exactly) I told Chris that I was scared. He had known of my struggles up to that point, but I really was expecting to begin labor sometime early the next morning, and that brought all my fears into a much sharper focus. I did finally sleep that night, but it wasn’t good sleep- I was much too worried. But labor didn’t start the next morning. I went to an ICAN meeting instead, and that helped some.”